With Marshmallows!

Loopy with fruitness
It's good! There's Vitamin C!
Toucan Sam's a sham

Mascot's a drunk mick
The farthest thing from "charming"
Your luck's just run out

Turning the milk brown
Cocoa Puffs make sludgy milk
Cuckoo Bird is nuts

They're fooling no one
Apple Jacks is fo' suckas
More like Apple Crap

Cookie Crisp: For crooks?
Ex-con centered cereal
Inside's a hacksaw

Mueslix cereal
The umlaut costs a bit more
Those twigs taste so good

A ghetto staple
Taste Cheeri-ho's cereal
They do all the work

Coked out of his mind
Sugar Bear's a playa/pimp
Golden Crisp drive-by

Horny little frog
Leader of the 'hood: Dig'Em
Sugar Smacks -- yo' ass!

Rice Krispie Midgets
Exclusive cult with harsh rules
Snap! Crackle! Don't stop!

Granola's for punks
All natural? Kiss my ass
Just go hug a tree

Dumb Cracklin' Oat Bran
Subliminal messages
For Crackers only

I've Got Cabin Feva...

Big winter lockdown
Colossal snow hits out coast
Keep changing channels

Snow, snow everywhere
Cabin fever? Who said that?
Answer the door armed

Cooped up and bored stiff
Cars buried under snow berms
Longing for more booze

I pity the fools
They're snowed in with kids at home
Their eyes stare blankly

Just the essentials
Milk, bread and toilet paper?
Pistol, bullets, beer

Turn off the TeeVee
Fried brain cells cry out, "Mercy!"
What's on next? Bowling?

The snow keeps falling
Imprisoned in your own house
No four-wheel drive

Schools closed. Work from home
Watch all the movies you own
Brew some more coffee

Scoop away white stuff
Not exactly a blizzard
People here freak out

Itching to escape
Hallucinations strengthen
Posters speak to you

A funky green cloud
Eager heads poke out their doors
Too much time inside

Re-run paradise
Daytime cable programming
Snow makes you watch it

Front-end loaders chug
Scoops filled to bursting with snow
Dumped onto my car