November 2003

Looking for a Fight

For about a million months now, we've been hearing those religious freaks (especially in the South) complaining non-stop about being denied religious freedom, and being oppressed because they can't have statues of the 10 Commandments in public buildings, or school sanctioned prayer on the morning announcements in public schools. Well, we ask, who the hell do they think they are? And where do they think they live?

Many of them are the same people who like to point out that our founding fathers constructed this nation on a Judeo-Christian framework, but what would our even earlier forefathers have to say about this - the ones who actually did suffer from oppression and denial of religious rights. Would the founding Catholics of Maryland really be upset upon hearing that an individual can pray anywhere they wanted, but the State cannot officially sanction a religion - leaving you on your own? Remember, these people were told to convert, or get the hell out of England.

To take it a step further, don today's fundamentalist Christians not know about the framers of the constitution, or do they chose to ignore them? Are they no aware that they were strict secularists? And that most of them were Deists? Thomas Jefferson, first and foremost, wanted to keep religion out of government and vice versa in order to lessen possible influence of tyranny, as history has proven that tyrants commonly use religion to keep the masses under their thumbs. Jefferson's beliefs are not a mystery. The man wrote down pretty much every single thought he's ever had. He also managed to put it all down, fairly explicitly, in the US Constitution. His contemporaries, for the most part, have very similar beliefs. To boot, our laws are based just as much on ancient Greek and Roman philosophies as Judeo-Christian. So, basically, the fundamentalist movement in America is just being selectively accurate.

Nobody is asking Alabama's Judge Moore (you know, Judge "I want to be Governor" Moore - he's a Fox "News" saint.) to convert or get out. No one will. But he acts as if that is exactly what is asked of him. On the other hand, it appears as if he is telling non-Christians that they aren't as welcome. He is going to judge them according to his own retarded interpretation of Deuteronomy - not the legally required standard. He, and his followers, want to have their cake and eat it, too. When the courts tell him that he cannot preach religion from the bench, he tells the courts that they have no jurisdiction. Playing to the Fox "News" cameras, he is always oppressed.

Of course, should Alabama ever have a orthodox Jewish or strict Muslim chief justice, surely this circus of "religious freedom" supporters would evaporate instantly.

What keeps our brains spinning is this question: how is preventing religious practices from being pushed on the public by public officials oppression? What day of civics class did we miss? We figure that our government was not supposed to endorse a religion. We also figure that 'government' includes judges.

On the '700 Club', Pat Robertson, when not calling for the bombing of the State Department or praying for the death of the liberal Supreme Court Justices, fumes over any anti-Christian (that's HIS Christianity, not necessarily yours) ruling or law or activity with expected fervor. What we've noticed is that he reserves his anger only for those who disagree with him. Those who do his bidding are good, Bible-reading Americans. That is pretty much what we found as well with the Alabama-Commandments-lovers: A self-centered, and myopic belief that they should get the Government THEY demand.

Big surprise? Not really. Not to us, at least.

A large aspect of being an American (or a human, for that matter) is coming to terms with loss, or not getting your way. Year after year, the bills you want do not always come out the way you want, nor does the Supreme Court or President make the decisions for which you hoped. That's part of the game. We have a framework in which the people play, and we get out of it what we can put into it (example: Wal-Mart employees get shit on, and Enron executives get rich.)

For years, the religious right have been playing a dangerous game of chicken with the courts and the Establishment Clause. With Quixotic defiance, Judge Moore paid for and erected a five-ton monument to the Bible's 10 Commandments in the main hall of his courthouse. The ACLU surprised no one when it challenged the constitutionality of the statue's placement in a public building, and we are sure that no one blinked when a court ordered the block removed. That was the point.

Judge Moore, Pat Robertson, and many other fundamentalist Christians thrive on the belief that theirs is an oppressed minority. They like to portray their brand of Christianity as "politically incorrect", and the only defense against the downfall of American culture. Prayer in school, abortion, evolution in textbooks, gay marriage, and the public display of the 10 Commandments are their rallying issues. When they win a fight, they are saving American. When they lose, American is dying on the inside.

Is anyone else offended by the actions of these people? Was anyone else repulsed by the hysterical reactions of Judge Moore's supportors outside the courthouse the statue was remove? The crying and the wailing. Did that seem contrived or disingenuous to anybody else? Besides, what would Jesus say about such prideful grandstanding?

Christianity is strong in the US of A. You can't shake a stick without finding a survey revealing that an astounding number of people believe in God, hell, and the Second Coming of Jesus. South and Central American immigrants bring their strong faith over the borders, and super-churches are now appearing in the North. Of course, none of this expansion is a product of government involvement. No new churches open with the help of major federal funds. Churches are built today with the money and support of the parishioners. American Christianity, at least according to every major survey we shake our sticks at, is as strong as ever.

Yet, for leaders like Bill Frist and Roy Moore (both southern white guys), American Christianity is coming apart at the seems. Why? Because America, while it can boast a great deal of Christians, never managed to endorse the faith in any of it's founding documents. In fact, they explicitly forbade state sanctioned religion. Thus it remains today. That's not right, some seem to think. Christianity, for the fundamentalists, should penetrate every aspect of American life.

They are not sufficed to teach their children in the safety of their homes and churches. They are not satisfied with the Ten Commandments hanging in their living rooms. No. No. No. They need to be in everyone's kitchen.

For the near future, they are sitting pretty: the Supreme Court is not going to reinstate Judge Moore or his statue, nor will they be able to overturn the California "Under God" decision. This will spur more donations. When the Court overturns the so-called "Partial-birth" abortion ban, their coffers will overflow. It does not matter to them that they are praying and fighting for various ways to insert their Christianity into American law and life.

We don't doubt that Judge Moore and Rick Santorum understand the difference between public grandstanding over gay marriage, or the 10 Commandments, and the real religious freedom we have here in the US of A. We also do not doubt that their success depends on their followers and constituents never understanding the difference.

For the average person, what's so terrible about being allowed to pray only at home, whatever church you want, any anywhere in public as long as you aren't forcing it on others? Isn't that absolute religious freedom? Damn right it is. And wasn't it only just for the framers of the constitution to design a system to prevent people from being forced to leave their homes in order celebrate their faith? Isn't that the essential freedom sought by the American colonists and the very cornerstone of our society? You're god damned right it is.

Remember, our freedom from being forced to pray by my teachers and government is my absolute right, and one of the primary reasons this nation was settled in the first place (we would like to point out that religion was a good cover for the biggest cash grab in human history.) It baffles our two great minds how this could at all be confusing to anybody.