Justy's Musical Cavalcade
Year in Review: 2001

In honor of the crazy new year, I am putting together this list of ten albums you absolutely have to have bought this year. If you didn't buy them, do so now. If you still do not buy them, YOU ARE A LOSER! GO HOME AND CRY TO YOUR STUPID MOMMY YOU STUPID LOSER BABY! I don't care if you actually like these albums or not, but you must own them. There will be no Alicia Keys here, or India.Arie, or U2, and especially no Train (What music critic asshole declared the guy from Train the new Springsteen? That critic and I need to have words.) So without further ado, the ten albums you should have bought this year, in no particular order.

RADIOHEAD - Amnesiac. I know a lot of people who don't like this record. I am not one of them. I think this album requires a Zen-like approach, where you need to listen easier, not harder, in order to make it work. But whatever, go buy it now - you still have time to be redeemed.

ROCKET FROM THE CRYPT - Group Sounds. Stripped down, beat up your neighbor rock and roll. Hands down, the number one rock band in the universe. I've even got the tattoo to prove it. This record will make you shake up and down and dance all over, or else.

THE WHITE STRIPES - White Blood Cells. Everyone in the world is waiting for this duo to break really big, but it will never matter if they do or not. They write sometimes rocking, sometimes folky, sometimes psychedelic songs for you to enjoy. Enjoy them now.

JURASSIC 5 - Quality Control. There aren't many rap CDs out these days that I can listen to. I have listened to this disc many times. They sample the "A Team" for chrissake, how cool is that? I dig it, even if these is a <shudder> Sean Lennon sample on it. I can not stand Sean fucking Lennon. But buy this disc anyway.

GORILLAZ - Gorillaz. Buy it, and you too will love singing cartoons like you never have, at least since the Banana Splits broke up.

MONEY MARK - Change is Coming. I believe I mentioned in my review of this CD that it made me dance immediately. I ask no further requirements of a great instrumental lounge/dance/funk disc.

STEPHEN MALKMUS - Stephen Malkmus. If you liked Pavement a long time ago, you probably hated this CD. If you liked Pavement in their later years, you probably hated this CD too. Fuck you both, I thought it was great. Anyone in the middle like me, I love you.

REMY ZERO - The Golden Hum. The reason you need to own this record is because Remy Zero is the nicest band on the planet, and their music is really good too.

I just realized that I'm at eight. I can think of other albums I bought this year, but none that I would recommend you buy. Craig David's "Born To Do It" maybe, Travis' "The Invisible Band," or Weezer's Green Album. No, I don't care if you own them or not. Everything else I bought this year that was worth my shit was from the past, like Monk and Coltrane, Miles Davis, etc. So go buy those eight anyway, I insist.

Now there were albums that should have been left on the shelves. If you bought anything by the following artists in 2001, I'm coming to your house:

• Train
• Five For Fighting
• Nickleback
• Linkin Park
• Staind
• Limp Bizkit (especially their "remix" album)
• Rod Stewart

and especially…

• Creed. It's like .38 Special with Eddie Vedder as the lead singer. I suppose that their upwardly spiraling record sales are the new eighth wonder of the world.

I hope you all take this to heart, because I am only trying to help you. If you have any questions, you know how to reach me.