July 2000

Airwave Pollution

On The Tube

I am so mad at Television right now. I’m getting fed up. TEEvee obviously hates me. Why else would the airwaves be occupied with the horrible "programming" that the American people have had to put up with this summer?

All these "reality" based programs and game shows must stop. We must not watch these horrible shows. Good ratings only encourage the networks. They think they have stumbled on to the greatest thing ever. These shows cost the networks very little to produce since they pretty much write themselves and the actors are free as well. Offer up a big prize and a bunch of idiots will volunteer to whore themselves out for a several months. Cheap bastards, those networks. And what makes it worse is that we are watching in almost record numbers. The networks stand to make record profits!

Why are we letting them get away with this? I sure don’t intend to be watching this kind of crap for the rest of my life. Please don’t tell me that you people are actually falling for this cheap crap? These shows are terrible- and the more we watch them the more of them we will see. See, it’s all a clever plot. Let me explain it. The networks figured out how to produce TEEvee "programming" with the lowest overhead and production costs. Then they air these shows during the summer when NOTHING else new is on. As a result these shows get huge ratings because at least we haven’t seen these shows before. The huge ratings attract huge advertising dollars. The networks now tell us that everybody loves these shows so them make more and get even more high ad revenue. It’s all a trick! Stop watching these shows, America.

Seriously, these shows suck. And there are more on the way. We deserve better. Really, we do. Don’t start calling me names and asking why I feel entitled to quality free entertainment, even though it’s free. Why? Because the airwaves belong to the American people. Airwaves are public space that are publicly regulated. The government just gave them away to the broadcasters. I won’t get into how devious of a lobby these bastards are, but needless to say they usually get what they want. Fine, I say. Let them have the airwaves for free. But in return I want something better than three months of a pack of losers "stranded" on a National Park in Malaysia. Also, to hell with their damned phony baloney "tribe" names. I don’t think CBS really thought out how potentially offensive that might be, nor how stupid.

So what are we, the American Television Viewing Public to do? Simple. Stop watching these damned shows. Stop watching unless you really want to see eight more seasons of "Survivor". If that’s what you want, well we’re on the right course you assholes. Network Television needs to be sent a message. A message that they can’t pull this shit on us. I am not advocating boycotting Television. God no. I am just urging my fellow citizens to change their viewing habits a little. Avoid these horrible shows. Watch more HBO, which airs actual quality entertainment (albeit the same 5 hours of quality entertainment over and over again every week). Watch anything but these awful reality/game shows. I don’t want to live in a world where the living would envy the dead- a world where we have to chose between watching "Big Brother" or not watching any Television at all.