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TV Notes

Once again, the Fox Network proved its love for me. Well, to be accurate, The Factor proved it's love for me. On March 6th, George W. Bush was interviewed and took it hard from Mr. Factor. Just as with the John McCain interview of over a month prior, Bush's appearance on The Factor was followed by a boost in voter support and a drubbing of his opponent at the polls. This writer is not a McCain nor a Bush fan, but Bush's timing could not have been better for him or his campaign. This is proof positive that the road to the White House goes through The O'Reilly Factor.

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The following Monday, however, I realized that I was wrong about my assessment of Fox and Friends. I had speculated earlier that Lauren Green was good but not essential to the funny and informative mix that is F+F, but I am here today to say that I was very wrong. Monday, March 12 started like any other Morning, I turned on F+F with expectations of happiness. While E.D. looked great, and Steve looked sharp, Lauren had been replaced by some other Fox'News' drone who could not polish her shoes. The entire experience lost a part of the magic. Call me old fashioned, but I like the classics. Lauren is one of my Fox and Friends.

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What the hell is up with NBC News? Tim Russert's Sunday gas bag show Face the Nation may be the second sexiest show on television (see later comments.) I watched Tim beat the snot out of Pat Buchanan last Sunday with great pleasure. How dare a Catholic ever embrace the idiot Protestants at Bob Jones University? What's next, a Jew courting the Nation of Islam? Trent Lott running for Mayor of Brooklyn? Anyway, should one be inclined try, getting it on with your lady after Face the Nation can be a mind blowing experience. "Lick it, smack it, rub it down! Oh! No!!!"

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What does the cast at Fox's funny and brilliant Futurama have to do to get some love around here? Some jerk at the network moved the show to the 7pm slot on Sunday. That will be the death of it. The Simpsons and Malcolm in the Middle have been the best rated shows on Fox this season, but Futurama is in the loser-hour before another Fox 'crap-o-rama', King of the Hill (don't get me started.) I weep for this country. 7pm is good for sleeping, that is why 60 Minutes rules that hour. The WWF kicks ass on a weekly basis in that time slot, but that is nothing new. Vince McMahon is the king of all kicking. One of his fellow Kings, Matt Groening has been wronged. I recommend that Vince and Matt open a can of whoop ass on a few Fox executives. That will teach them a lesson.

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Finally, the world I live in is full of danger and excitement. One time the Direct TV came loose and I climbed up on the roof and almost fell! But whatever the Gods have in store for me on a given day, I can always count on the sexy theme music on The O'Reilly Factor. When people wonder why the factor smiles you know it is because he is writing another sexy jazz riff for the show. The Factor is always calm and collected (and humble) because he lives in a studio with a classy and tight house band. When your house is classy and tight, how can the wrongs of the world matter?

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The O'Reilly Factor is the best show on TV. Don't try to fight it.

I am Grandpa, and I like TV.