Third Anniversary Special/2002

Returning to Ahimsa

After quite a long absence, I sat today. It's not that I've been on a quest for a Guinness record; I haven't been standing all this time. Today I sat on a meditation cushion simply for the sake of sitting and being. I sat for quite a while silently in a room full of others - sitting. I hadn't done that for a while. I have to say it's the ultimate kickin' back.

What did you do today?
Sat.
Uh-huh. And….?
Well, I also have been breathing. Other than that, I sat.
Oooo-kay.

Meditation has a normalizing effect on me that I just can't achieve by other kickin' back strategies. I feel refreshed like I always want to feel after a long sit on the sofa. But somehow the sofa always means the Tee-Vee and therefore transporting outside of myself and today's happenings in Baltimore. After a good sofa stretch I just feel disconnected. After a good cushion stretch, I feel pleased, aware of life, and aware of one foot being asleep. The similarity between Tee-Vee sitting and meditation sitting is that time itself seems to both creep and speed past. (How long will I have to wait for King of the Hill to be over? How on earth did the whole evening disappear without me doing anything?)

After meditation, I joined a Buddhism class at the local sangha. The class was nothing I hadn't heard or thought or felt before. But that doesn't mean it was worthless at all. It was a return to my core thoughts about community and the way to live life well. Sometimes it's hard for me to reconcile my inner core with my desire to be physically safe and socially acceptable. But my heart says what I really love: Take down the hardened shell of the city commuter and restore the happiness of active compassion. Remember that I'm one member of the great big We. It's refreshing to let go of convention & let life be.

So, how am I celebrating the third anniversary of Evil Robots? Kickin' back, buddha-style.